Practice Uncategorized

finding value in the negative

The Mood Alchemist

Never mind him. Let’s focus on the positive. At least those kind of people have shown me clearer what it is I am looking for in people who I surround myself with.

Those were the words of a friend and collaborator from Amsterdam recently as we were planning a conference together. They were referring to that guy – you know that guy, the one who’s on your social media platform of choice, or attends that club you enjoy, or is on the board of that organization you hate to love. They are the person who seems to only find their own identity through tearing down others, doing their best to make everyone else agree with them. Failing an obvious target they will stir up something for no particular reason or weigh in on some topic that they have no particular interest in.

I understand the urge; it’s the darker side of my own particular fetish for being relevant, but in the case of this particular individual he at one point decided the best way to be relevant was to begin trash-talking me in public performing arts forums. So I confess that hearing my friend mention his name provided an excellent opportunity for me to practice my anger-management skills.

Another Frakkin’ Growth Opportunity

Which might have been what this post would be about, except for that follow up from my friend. Never mind him…he has shown me what I am looking for in the people in my surroundings. What a brilliant way to not only neutralize his poison, but also to turn it into a panacea, a perspective-sharpening treatment that pulls the world she wants closer to her reality. She was practicing the alchemy of moods without even needing to reframe; instead, that personal attack just became another datum of information that made her more powerful.

This I do not want. Ergo, you are that much better at finding that which you do want.

That’s worth some practice, in my book. Since I seem to have the Anger Management down pat, maybe it’s time to move onto more advanced techniques when the anger management isn’t even necessary…

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