Life

Your Non-Standard-Issue Life

You know why you’re not happy? It’s because you only think of yourself. Sorry, I don’t mean to be cruel – maybe you are happy, and if you are, then there’s also the very real likelihood that it’s because you can think of someone else. It’s been shown that service is one path that leads …

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Life

Posts for Grandkids: The Secret to Happiness

Hey there! This is the first in what will be an occasional series of posts that are directed at you, the children of my children. We’ll let other people read them, too, because that’s kind of the age I live in now, and they might enjoy or benefit from what I’m writing now. I also …

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Love

Attention is What Buys You Happiness

In my research into the art of cigar smoking (yes, I do lead an interesting life; cigars are tax-deductible) there was one particular conclusion that I came to in regards to the portrayal of cigars as tokens of power. I mean, that is part of the allure of cigars, as portrayed in popular culture: they …

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Life

You Don’t Know Jack

A few weeks ago Natasha and I were sitting with several friends enjoying the last of an unseasonably warm November outside at a pool hall (that location is only relevant for the readers of the blog who know that I once was Harold Hill, which number now includes you). A lot of the discussion was …

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Love money

“wan­der­ers, dream­ers, and lovers”

I hate to break it to you, but I haven’t got it figured out. I know you come to this blog to read pearls of wisdom to help you find your way to happiness and contentedness and better, whiter, teeth or at least wider smiles, but I’m afraid there’s very little of that here. You …

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Life money

The Money Path to a Happy Life

Practical tools to make hard times happier. That's the goal of this blog, and this is one of those rare moments where I feel I can offer some hard evidence for ways to improve the happiness of your life. (That is, as far as the social/psychological studies can be considered to be “hard” evidence of …

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Practice

the true cost of distraction

Paying Attention Over the weekend I had one of those epiphanies. One of those moments that changes your perspective on things, that makes you suddenly see the elephant in the room. Specifically, it’s the metaphor of the elephant as being the bulk of our subconscious psyche – our emotions, our habits, our desires. It’s an …

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Love

should you do what you love?

Love & Other Disasters In episode 30 of the “You Are Not So Smart” podcast there is an interview with sports writer David Epstein, in which they talk extensively about that infamous “10,000 hour” rule. It was popularized by Malcolm Gladwell in his book Outliers and is based heavily on the work of a Dr. …

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Practice

cultivate synthetic happiness

The Wrong Toolbox Fair warning: this is going to be one of those posts where I bring up a need, something that’s missing from the  bulk of personal development blogs. In a nutshell, it’s our inability to cultivate synthetic happiness. I’ll go into what that is, but I feel the need to explain in advance …

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Love

love makes you happier

SitRep: Project Friends & Family It was about six months ago that I made the decision to stop focusing on my career and my romantic pursuits. I was in a place where I’d followed a lot of the wisest advice I could find in both categories, and nothing seemed to be giving me much joy. …

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